Viewing entries in
self-esteem

The End of Love

The End of Love

An Anti-Assimilationist Valentine's Day

I know I don't have to tell you that February 14th is barreling towards us at superluminal velocity. You also may know that if you're not in a romantic relationship, you might as well crawl back into your lair and resume braiding your body hair or filing the fingernails on your dewclaws, or whatever it is that single people do, because how dare you attempt to join the ranks of those who will not be dying alone.

But if you do, however, happen to be in love, well I'm sure you know better than to erect anything less than the most stunning and enthusiastic tribute to your beloved, replete with chocolate, champagne, sex in more than one position, and possibly a proposal.

Am I right?

Unless of course, you're not in the business of celebrating corporate sponsored heteronormativity, underwritten by Hallmark, self-hatred and comfort pastries; or the holy day also known as Valentine's Day.

Valentine's Day -- destroyer of all things -- is a celebration of everything that's wrong with our rendition of modern love. There's nothing quite like this arbitrary event to magnify our expectations, diminish our relationships and test our self-esteem. Come February 1st, convenience store aisles, awash in the empty symbology of romance, close in on us with one message, and one message only:

Continue Reading at Huff Post

Read More
Chill Like That

Chill Like That

Why it’s just not cool, to be chill.

When it comes to dating, being “chill” has climbed the ranks as a highly coveted, basically non-negotiable quality that our romantic partners should possess. Wait. Did I say dating? I meant “hanging out.” Or “talking to.” Or “chillin with…”

Sorry, I’m not sure… 

A few minutes on Tindr, Hitch, or Cupid, will render incontrovertible evidence that if you are not CHILL, then you might as well be dead. 

Wait, what’s that? You’re honest and fun? Understanding and ambitious? You have amazing personal hygiene, great friends, and breasts that men and women alike would murder their grandmother to get their hands on? Doesn’t matter. If you’re not chill, then, well, good luck to you.  

A culture of “chill” has invaded out modern dating climate.

Checking the weather? Don’t bother. It’s chill. It’s always chill.

Read More
Fed-Ex Your Ex

Fed-Ex Your Ex

5 NO-NONSENSE WAYS, TO SEND YOUR EX PACKING FOR GOOD.

Ok, so you just got dumped. It was awful. You looked down at your phone and there it was, a text from your now ex saying something like “it's over baby, xoxo Gossip Girl.”

Or it was even worse and your partner said they “loved you, but they weren’t in love with you." Yeah right.

Or get ready for this: they died. Yep, that happens.

It really doesn’t matter if your break-up was with your love of 50 years or with that dude from OKCupid who looks just like Anderson Cooper and decided to stop emailing you. Or even if it was with the cutie who works at Gap, who you’re not exactly dating, but you could be...

Getting over a broken heart is hard. Maybe one of the hardest things in the world.

Read More
Lonely forever? No way.

Lonely forever? No way.

It’s right up there with getting eaten by a shark or falling from the sky in a 747. For many of us, there is no greater fear than ending up lonely forever.If you don’t relate to this scenario, then stop reading right now. Seriously, go somewhere else. Also, I don’t believe you.

But, if there are days when you’d gladly give yourself a haircut with a pair of craft scissors in exchange for the promise of a lifetime of love, companionship and Friday night plans, then you’re in the right place.

I’LL TELL YOU EXACTLY WHAT TO DO TO PREVENT BEING LONELY FOREVER.

Here is the secret, ready? Start liking yourself as much as you want your next date to like you.

If you genuinely enjoy your own company; if you think you’re hilarious and have a quirky, yet totally adorable fashion sense; if you like the sound of your own voice and you think you’re charming and smart and you can spend hours by yourself at the farmers market; if you can clearly hear the wise and quiet voice that lives inside you, then, whether you’re single or not, you will never feel truly alone.

Read More